Writing Dialogue
Say What? Yvonne Cassidy on Dialogue
It’s always nice when someone says something nice about your writing, but I always feel especially happy when a reader compliments my dialogue. Good dialogue reads as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to write, but in my experience, it’s not. Dialogue is an area I’ve always found challenging and here are a few tips that have helped me along the way.
1. Dialogue doesn’t have to mimic a real life conversation word for word. Often we are long winded and repetitive – the reader will want to get to the point and the action, quicker than that. Write out the conversation and then cut it back– typically, I’ll cut by a third.
2. In real life, we don’t always say what we mean so your characters don’t have to either.
‘Do you think it might be a bit wet to go out tonight?’ means ‘I’d prefer if we’d stayed in.’ The ‘unsaid’ will let us know just as much as the words on the page.
Dialogue, Please!
I came to writing very late in life. Aged 63, newly retired, I had time on my hands and as an avid reader I decided to try my hand at writing myself. No doubt you’ve all often taken up a pretty awful book and thought ‘I could do better than this. If they managed to get published maybe I could too’. That’s how I felt so for weeks I mulled it over in my head – mainly at night, while lying awake. Beats thinking about your problems and perhaps your bank balance (as John Banville said recently onIrelandAM)
Well, finally the scene was set – a slimming club in Co. Kildare - my characters defined, and I was up and running. I found it amazingly easy. Once I knew my characters well they just took off on their own in directions I could never have imagined. It was exhilarating. ‘Because We’re Worth It’ was born.
To my surprise Paula Campbell of Poolbeg liked my story but said it needed a lot of work. I agreed to do that which surprised them (seemingly a lot of authors refuse to change anything). I had no such ego and was just delighted that I would be published.
Paula wasn’t joking. It needed a mountain of work! The big mistake I’d made was that I’d just told a story – straight up – and that doesn’t work. When I got my ms back from my editor, Gaye, it was littered with red and blue marks. And the majority of them said “Dialogue, please!” I realised that I had made a major error and as soon as I changed the straightforward telling with dialogue – the book came alive. There were also a few “How did she sound when she was talking? What tone of voice? What actions?” It was the best advice I could have received and once I followed her advice my book became so much better. Good editors are like goldust!
Dialogue and Action Tags
Writing dialogue can be tricky. The writer has to make sure that the dialogue fits the character, sounds right on the ear, and flows. It’s also imperative that the speaker is identified. In a long run of dialogue, between say, two female characters, using ‘she said’ as dialogue tags is bound to run the writer right into trouble.
Here’s an example using dialogue tags with names. I’ve put the dialogue tags in red for clarity.
Rosa’s eyes were red and puffy, and her nose watered. It wasn’t the best look for a blushing bride.
“Come on, Rosa. It’ll be all right,” Melo said. She draped an arm around her petite sister, carefully avoiding the pins, and hugged her close.
Rosa’s frantic sobs stuttered and stopped.
Melo unwrapped another tissue, and then stowed the packet back next to the screwdriver and emergency chocolate bar. Thank goodness. She had enough on her plate without having to deal with her sister’s histrionics.
“Will Papa be fit enough to take me down the aisle?” Rosa asked.
“We’ll just have to see what the doctor says.” Melo’s head began to throb and she cursed the fact her tool belt wasn’t packing paracetamol.
Changing these dialogue tags to action tags, means that the writing flows better and more information can be added in to illuminate character.
The Essential Ingredient
Pick up any well paced, commercial fiction novel, flick through the pages, and chances are, there is lot and lots of dialogue. Good use of dialogue is the most effective way of maintaining story momentum, drawing in the reader and helping them to understand characters, and it is a major tool in developing conflict between two characters, which is at the heart of every story.
Seeing conflict happen as present action in the story is far more interesting and engaging than reading about what has or what might happen. Dialogue plays a huge part in keeping the reader turning the pages and developing empathy for the character. If you find the pace of your novel is flat or weighed down, consider rewriting some scenes in a dialogue format:
I’d like to start by giving you an example. This is taken from my latest novel Rival Passions, and it shows how I rewrote a scene using dialogue to inject more energy into it.
All You Need to Know About Dialogue with Tracy Culleton
Tracy Culleton is the best selling author of Looking Good, a teacher and regular faciliator for Inkwell, here she tells you exactly how to make your dialogue sing.
Points to remember:
- Dialogue does not attempt to replicate real speech.
- Leave out most of the ‘um’s and ‘ah’s and the repetitions and the half sentences.
- But it should give the flavourof real speech, by including things like, “You know,” in moderation. For example:
- Real people often speak in asides, and it can be good to include in moderation in your dialogue. For example: “I was heading into town – do you know, the traffic gets worse every day, I swear – when I met John”.
Read more: All You Need to Know About Dialogue with Tracy Culleton
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